it's time for me to stop living in denial and face the facts that soon i will be going back to work full-time, and won't be able to be with J all-day, every-day...
i didn't really think i would have as hard a time processing this as i'm having. i mean, seriously, i thought if anyone would be having separation anxiety it would be him! but J has been a great baby, and i've really enjoyed watching him evolve daily into a little person with his own little personality. so it really makes me sad that my time with him is going to be drastically reduced. we're very fortunate that one of my good friends (C) will be watching him during the day for us. so i *know* he will be safe and in good hands, but it's still tough to think about.
so D suggested that i start taking him to C for a couple of hrs for the next couple of weeks to build up to leaving him when i go back to work full-time. when he 1st suggested it, i thought it was overkill, especially since we have been to her house a few times together the past few weeks for various reasons, and i will be working half-days for the first week or 2 before i start full-time. but after my mini anxiety attack yesterday, i think he's probably right. so C was kind enough to allow us to bring him by a couple of days next week, so that i can "practice" turning him over to someone else for a few hrs. i really thought i'd have no problem letting someone else "deal" with him....wrong! he's been my sidekick for almost 11 months, so i'm really going to miss him not being there! :(
any moms out there have any tips on how to soften the blow? or should i just carry a box of tissue with me that first week??
Back to School for the Child Loss Parent
5 years ago
3 comments:
Tiffany, you are going thru the feelings of every mom who has to go back to work from "materity leave". Dennis is giving you some good advice and this way you have time to make sure everything is working out the way you want, with you and Julius at your friends home. Knowing that he's safe and loved is what you want.This is going to give you that peace of mind you're looking for. Just remember how your "abuela" took great care of you and Melissa. The best part is when you pick up Julius, to see his eyes light up and his beautiful smile when he hears your voice.
Welcome to the other side of the motherhood filled with hard to let go and guilt:-)Staying at home or going back to work,either way it's hard.It doesn't matter if they are few weeks old or almost 8:-)
It's always something and never gets easier.
I think Dennis is right,that way you can slowly adjust to the change.And you'll def. need those tissues at first but soon you'll see he is doing good and that he is happy and you'll be fine too:-)
He is in really good hands with C.
And you'll get to spend more quality time with him during the week and then savor the weekends.
Not really an advice amigita bonita,sorry,but sending hugs and lots of love to you.
Beso!
Oh, this is such a hard thing! Even when I went to work at my son's preschool 3 half-days a week, and even though my son was almost 9 months old, AND even though my mother was taking care of him, it was STILL hard.
My advice is to find out if C has a camera/phone on which she can take lots of pictures of J when he does cute stuff. Often times when I was working at daycares/preschools, the parents said it was the little things they missed: peas in the hair, discovering a new toy, the first time sitting up, etc. It might help to know that C would be able to click a pic and immediately send it to your phone or work email, that way it's *almost* like you're there. Or get her to write down funny stuff he does during the week so you can look it over and save it for his baby book (or your blog).
I know it doesn't fix things, but I hope you find some suggestions to ease the transition! And just remember that no matter what else, YOU are his mama and the one his world revolves around, and that will never change. :-)
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